there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
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