Slut skills are useful in every country.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
