this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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