Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(702): View more from Nevada

did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???

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(585): View more from New York

Why was I handcuffed to the roof?

(518): View more from New York

It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly

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(859): View more from Kentucky

#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.

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(310): View more from California

I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"

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(406): View more from Montana

It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?

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(305): View more from Florida

God, I missed his penis.

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