I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize
