im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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