2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
