my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
