I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
