i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
