I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
