HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
