Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
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