I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
