Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
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