return my video game
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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