After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
