We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
