i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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