names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
