he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize