You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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