its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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