Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I think i peed on brittanys purse
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
If I die, sorry about rent.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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