I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Randomize
