yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
