We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize