Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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