I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
