therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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