So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize