It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Randomize
