Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
