Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
