wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Randomize
