Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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