I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
