I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
