We're facebook friends in real life
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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