Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
