i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize