Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
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