No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Rumble strips road head = magical
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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