He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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