we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
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