Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
