What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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