yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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