So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize