ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
