Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I love you. Go after that dick
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize