Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
